Trust and Vibrational Habits
Da Pah Kwan Yin San
April 12, 2018
Akeyasan 1: I would like to learn about trust.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: What does trust mean to you, personally?
Akeyasan 1: The idea of truly trusting something, to me, is an entirely different operating system than what I have been used to living.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: When you say “truly trusting something,” what does trust mean to you in that context?
Akeyasan 1: There is a feeling inside, a feeling of love, and trusting that expansive feeling, trusting the love, that is what I am trying to learn, instead of shying away from it, or not daring to believe that it is really there.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: In that type of situation, where you are shying away from trusting love, what part of you is attempting to achieve trust in love? And what part of you are you attempting to trust and love? What is trusting what? And who is trusting who? Do you know?
Akeyasan 1: Trusting is different than knowing because trusting is defined between two different people, or between two different things, while knowing is just about the self.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: The act of trusting is not an act that is defined in the relationship between two different beings or things. You, simply put, are the self, but you are also the whole, in which the experience of the self and the other self is taking place; therefore, you are doing the trusting.
The difference between you wanting to trust something within yourself, such as the love that you feel within, or you wanting to trust something outside of the self, such as the love that another self is claiming to have for you, is ultimately irrelevant. You are the one doing the trusting. Whether it is the self within trusting the self within, or whether it is the self within trusting the other self, it is still you, the self, that is experiencing the act of trusting the self or the other self. It is a closed loop, always.
Akeyasan 1: But my trust in the other self, or even in myself, can ultimately be misplaced or misconstrued, right? I could be lying to myself, or someone could be lying to me.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: Actually, your interpretation of trust between the self, the other self, and the whole – or, rather, this way of thinking – is based on an old vibrational pattern, a belief system, in this instance, that leads one to think that there is a discrepancy, an unbalance if you will, between the expression of the self internally and the experience of the self, the other self, or the whole, externally, or vice versa.
Akeyasan 1: Yes, I started to realize it as soon as you started explaining, thank you for doing so.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: which, ironically, can be at the cause of a creative effort, leading to the exact opposite that one wants to express or experience in the first place, and from the heart.
Akeyasan 1: That is exactly the situation I so often find myself in and want to stop manifesting for myself and for others.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: Indeed. The vibrational pattern, or the belief system, that we are observing in this case, in your earlier statement, leads to energy duplication, which literally means the actual duplication of your energy, in order to make the two separated perspectives of the whole self possible.
In other words, you are participating in a three-step tango, a dance between the self, the other self, and the whole, but a dance based on old information and old habits that are no longer beneficial to your experience of self and of the whole, now that you have entered the Study of the Pah.
Although it has brought you valuable experience during your immersion in the Study of Vibration – experience that may have become so habitual to you that it became a comfortable sensation – such belief in separated states of the self will only limit those that attempt the Study of the Pah.
Due to your cultural and societal beliefs that you carried with you throughout your lifetime, most of which you brought with you as you engaged in the Study of Vibration, you mistakenly accepted that there were individualized and separate parts of the self and the whole that you had little choice but to trust without having any form of proof as to whether your trust was justified or not: these are, firstly, the so-called internal and external realities of your life, as well as, secondly, the people that present themselves in your environment directly and, more abstractly, in the world at large, and, ultimately, thirdly, yourself.
When observed without emotion or engagement, one can come to understand that this process of perceived separation of the self, the other self, and the whole, is precious, because it essentially allows for the self to learn to trust the other self and the whole. Once this occurs, however, those parts, once perceived as separate, can be seen for what they truly are: oneness reflected in oneness, infinitely and eternally so. Then, there is no more need for that gap between the perceived individuality of the self and the otherness of the reality in which the self finds itself.
When contemplating these things, one would do well to also consider one of Da Pah Ekara San’s Six Simplicities, “Trust before Truth,” where one is taught to send parts of one’s consciousness outward, to explore a scenario or a situation before one steps into that scenario and animates it.
You can, of course, jump into any situation without much consideration, but working with the Simplicity of “Trust before Truth” means informing the mind and the heart properly of one’s intentions, leading to a state of focused, balanced awareness of that, which is real and truthful, in comparison to that, which is illusion or imagined.
“Trust before Truth” is, however, not about trusting blindly and leaping forward into the unknown abyss, often considered a cornerstone of spirituality and many faiths, but ultimately one that, by its very nature, consists of the notion of separation, a limited perception of the self, and a disjointed hierarchy.
Trust can only be truly experienced or expressed in Truth, one of the building blocks of San. In that way, it reaches beyond the imagined limitations of the self, embracing the other self and the whole all at once.
Trust, then, is a creational effort. Without it, reality creation stagnates.
When, however, one filters the self, the other self, and the whole, through systems of separation as previously explained, the closed loop of trust can only be created by the illusory act of energy duplication, implying that a part of the self is duplicated to, either within the self or the other self, fulfill that closed loop of trusting in a manner that is both extraneous and wasteful. Do you understand?
Akeyasan 1: I believe I understand everything except for that last sentence.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: By working with energy in the way I just described, you are unnecessarily forcing yourself to separate a part of your energy from yourself, and you place it in a part of yourself that appears separate from you. Then, to compensate, you feel the need to fill that gap. But to fulfill that need, trust is required, and so the energy duplication goes on and on, needlessly so.
Akeyasan 2: If I understand correctly, the self does not need to trust the self, because it is the self and the whole already, and it always has been.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: That is correct.
Akeyasan 2: The simplicity of it is staggering, because there is no other thing. There is not this little self that we believe to be real. If we consider trust from that perspective of the whole self, its natural state has to be trust of the self, the other self, and the whole. Therefore, it is not really about trust, but about simply being the self in its entirety. That is what I understood you said.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: What is important to consider is that you are taking an extra step that is no longer necessary in tonal space, which became a habit and then the norm in a vibrational reality based on separation and on feeling unsafe all the time, most often without even realizing that this is how you operated.
In order to defend itself against that world of separation, the self creates another version of the self, which it separates from the self, leading this duplicated version of the self to identify as the original self, essentially shielding the original self from the world of separation. Think of it as a clone of the self, less real than yourself because it has been designed to mimic true feeling and to only operate within the emotional range instead.
The original self, technically unaware any of this is actually occurring, can be considered to be in an energetic coma, the result of numbing itself in this way, working instead with a scout of itself, which the mind/personality/ego construct will then inhabit instead, leaving the actual self in a void: not truly alive, not receiving or accessing lifeforce, but instead being a muted witness to itself, stuck in a complexity of its own making, a safety mechanism gone wrong, the result of a lifetime in vibrational reality. All of this occurs at the level of the mind/personality/ego construct.
Beyond that construct, of course, exists the persona, as explained during Sessions 284 through 286 of the Study of Vibration, and it is at the level of the self that is the persona where you can truly observe the mechanism that we are exposing in this fashion. This level, then, where the ego/mind/personality construct can be observed, is where the mechanism can be stopped and where healing can take place.
On the level of the persona, the various aspects of the personality can be merged and the duplication of the self can not only come to an end but be undone altogether. Much like Russian dolls, the copies of the self that operated on vibrational terms can be put back in the main, tonal self and given their proper vibrational place within this larger, tonal self that is the persona, which by default exists in an expanded state that is far beyond any and all vibrational reality.
But until you do so, there is a seconding of the self, a splitting, the creation of alters that cannot truly access the realm of feeling and of San, like refractions of light caught between two mirrors, going back and forth ad infinitum. The more copies of the self are created in this way, the more ghost-like the personality appears, the less substance there seems to be, until these multiple refractions eventually take over for the personality, even, in an attempt to copy the mind/ego/personality construct and the way it operates. Narrowing the parameters of one’s existence to such an extent that even the mind/ego/personality construct has no room to maneuver seems almost impossible, I know, but it happens quite often.
All the while, of course, the self, which is in itself the whole, is infinite, and, once having reached tonal space, it becomes simply impossible to believe that one can splinter the self in such a way.
Akeyasan 1: Yes, I believe I can trust that.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: Many of you probably are not aware of this yet, but in Sessions 213 and 214 of The Study of Vibration, in which the concept of the “rainbow room” is introduced, the student already begins to learn about the topics that we are now discussing.
The “rainbow room” that is discussed in those Sessions can be considered the vibrational reality, the third density, in which most of humanity exists. The student is offered exercises that begin to bring about an active understanding of time and space, of past, now, future, etc.
What is not explained in those Sessions yet, however, is that the “rainbow room” that the student is introduced to can be seen as a bridge between the physical reality of space/time and the metaphysical reality of time/space.
It is the awareness of the limited reality of the “rainbow room” that allows for the transformation of vibrational reality, aka the “rainbow room”, from that, which once seemingly imprisoned the student, due to a lack of the ability to properly understand the space and time experience one finds oneself in, into that, which now becomes the very bridge to the student’s freedom: the breakthrough into tonal space.
In that sense, the idea of breaking through from vibrational reality into the more expansive, tonal reality that surrounds it, can be seen as an egg that is about to hatch in a bird’s nest. Consider the inside of the egg the vibrational reality, which initially seems to contain the being within, until it has made itself ready to hatch. At that point, it will crack the shell, which, once impenetrable and forming the boundary of the vibrational reality in which the being found itself, now becomes the bridge between the reality inside and outside of the shell, the latter being the tonal reality that we have been discussing.
To continue the metaphor, it can be said that the bird’s nest, then, is the tonal reality, which eventually will itself become too narrow for the being, as it were, until it leaves the nest for the universe at large, which, in closing this metaphor, would be akeneic space itself. But more about that later on.
As such, you can learn from these “rainbow room” Sessions, when you combine them with what we are discussing in this conversation, that the vibrational reality, as well as the vibrational self, is not necessarily a negative; instead, it allows for incubation of the self until the self understands its holofractographic relationship to the other self and the whole self, or the creator self.
Once this is properly understood, the awareness of the self expands to the consciousness of the tonal self. To properly understand this expansion from the vibrational self to the tonal self, however, the akeyasan student must realize that the vibrational self, the third density, the five-sense reality model, the dimensions of time and space themselves, all exist somewhere deep within the adonai’ka (the belly kakra) of the akeyasan student, and it always will.
Therefore, the akeyasan student ultimately learns to come to terms with this vibrational part of the self, and will even be able to apply the knowledge one gained from being in the self-inflicted, limiting experience of being the vibrational self, in order to be of service to others that are themselves going through the learning experience of believing themselves to be that limited, vibrational self only.
Knowing this, however, it’s not so difficult to conclude that you, as you become aware of all of this and expand into the tonal self, will need to take some time to truly come to terms with everything that has been explained here.
Does anyone feel that they still are, in a sense, in recovery from believing only the vibrational reality of the so-called “rainbow room” to be real?
Akeyasan 3: Learning how to navigate reality with this new, tonal operating system can certainly present its unique set of challenges. It takes practice, but so does everything that is new and exciting. I can’t think of anything more exciting than this.
Overall, I feel enormously empowered to be navigating and experiencing this new, tonal space. It is the real deal. For now, it’s still a bit hard to find the right words to describe it.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: Does the Pahdasan’ka wish to share or offer anything at this point?
Da Pahdasan’ka Barak Solarys San: I seem to experience waves, where sometimes language is truly felt and at other times it is harder to grasp, which suggests to me that there still might be some recovery going on. While this conversation is happening, it’s becoming clear to me that there are still things about the vibrational self that I hadn’t realized, which must have been affecting all of us on levels that we weren’t aware of or that we didn’t think we could be affected on. In short, I think everyone must still be somehow recovering, even if we aren’t necessarily intellectually aware that we are.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: These waves, or ups and downs, that you are experiencing, do you believe they are part of the recovery I was pointing to, or could they merely be a vibrational habit that has been affecting your entire stay in vibrational reality as well as everything that you have done and experienced there?
Vibrational reality, after all, with its built-in duality, forces you to believe that, by default, things that go up must come down again. Vibration runs on duality, the one cannot go without the other. The relationship between the two is expressed in frequency.
The parts of you that have become addicted to those vibrational ups and downs, to those dualistic frequencies, then, would be trained to seek out those waves, by working through both your conscious mind and your subconscious mind, but most often by working through the latter, using passive attributes (see SOV Session 297) to complete the task.
In a way, you can be said to be creating these up and down waves yourself, therefore, in the sense that you do not just seek them out but generate them because you have come to expect them as part of your living, or having lived, in the vibrational, frequential realms. That, in this case, is a vibrational habit you have taken on as your own, much like many others have. And because you are not yet used to the normal flow of tonal space – where, when rising yourself up you not only stay up but continue to rise unhindered, with no friction to stop your upward momentum nor your expansion – you seek the comfort of the vibrational habit without yet having come to the understanding that those mechanisms, in tonal space, will no longer support you in any way.
In my opinion, there are many things that any of you could mention, but all of them, in one way or another, are vibrational habits. Rather than needing to identify these habits individually, you can choose for peace and comfort instead.
Peace is not the opposite of war. Peace is not the opposite of conflict or duality. For those that arrive in a state of tonal peace and comfort for the first time, after a stay in vibrational space, peace can be very challenging to get used to, once again due to vibrational habits that might still be in play.
In the space of the total, tonal self – which is where peace exists – everything is generated by the self as a holofractographic expression of the whole. When I say “everything is generated by the self” in this sense, I also mean all possible memories of all possible realities that one has experienced in vibrational reality, all of which were ultimately self-generated.
To come, therefore, to a true sense of peace and comfort, this understanding must be reached. It is vital that one does, because it is this realization of the holofractographic relationship between the self, the other self, and the whole creator self, within a context of the lifetime or lifetimes lived within vibrational reality, that will bring one’s vulnerability to vibrational habits to a close once and for all.
In short, once one remembers that the memory of the vibrational self is ultimately one’s own creation, peace can arise as one expands into the tonal self and lets go of what was once believed to be real.
When one embraces the truth that it is not so that vibrational reality does not matter but instead that it matters in the sense that it assists in the incubation of the self growing to understand it is the whole – much like one would remember a dream one has had and now can use that dream to interpret a situation in waking life – one can reorganize one’s opinions and interpretations of one’s vibrational past by no longer seeing it as one’s entire history but merely a facet of a larger whole that one now can begin to embrace as the tonal self. That is when a state of true, tonal peace will occur for the student. At that point, any and all vibrational habits will cease by necessity, for one remembers that what one thought was one’s past, and therefore one’s future, is not more important than the plot of the many novels, movies, or tv shows most of you have undoubtedly read or watched during your vibrational lifetimes.
You will ultimately find, as all do, that you will not merely contemplate the vibrational experience from a perspective of true, tonal peace, the reasons of which I have just discussed, but that it will actually be remembered and treated as an experience that you very much enjoyed indeed, even though you may not think of your vibrational, dualistic lives in this way just yet.
Once the experience of it all is no longer so very all-encompassing, and once you can look at it all as a small but necessary part of a much bigger picture, your ability to interact with vibrational reality while remaining within a tonal one, will emerge, which can occur because of the fact that the smaller, vibrational self will always remain as its own sphere within the much larger spheres of the tonal and akeneic selves.
It would be my advice to continue to observe any recurring vibrational habits from the perspectives I have now given you and see where that takes you.
Akeyasans 1 & 3: Thank you.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: As all that have gone before you did, you too will come to see, in the case of the concept of trust, for instance, or the concept of duality itself even, that a strong and solid foundation can be built, beyond the vibrational limitations that you once knew, in tonal space, beyond finiteness, where situations no longer are cursed with the definitions of beginnings, middles, or endings.
Akeyasan 1: Yes, I understand how these vibrational experiences and those things that we counted on are not gone but can be seen for what they truly are, without beginning or end. Vibrational reality is not to be discarded but seen as the foundation it truly is.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: Yes, indeed.
Akeyasan 2: I wonder if I have these vibrational habits.
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: That is for you to explore, of course.
Akeyasan 2: Do people choose their own vibrational habits, or is it something that happens entirely unaware?
Da Pah Kwan Yin San: Vibrational habits are not created voluntarily; they are a consequence of vibrational activity.
When, for instance, the akeyasan student commences Eja’i chi Pah training, which can be translated as the Practice of the Pah – or, to say it metaphysically, “the gentle art of stepping into infinity by being here now” – the student learns that it is indeed possible to never generate vibrational consequences when interacting with vibrational reality. It may require quite some focus to achieve, but it is within reach.
Imagine, if you will, a large bell that is vibrating because it has been made to ring. After a little while, when ringing has almost faded away but there is still a subtle audibleness to it; the bell is still generating vibrations in ever lower frequency cycles. Then, the sound dies down completely, at least as far as the ear is concerned. But the ear is wrong. What happened instead is that those vibrations that one could pick up have become internalized. This is to be taken on two levels of understanding: the vibrations have now become part of the matter of the bell itself, its energetic-vibrational state permanently changed because of that fact, yet those same vibrations have also become part of you, who, equally, has now forever changed as the result of adding those vibrations to the self and to the whole.